1600 days ago

Wednesday's funny: 😄🏪Kmart Interview🏪 😄

Fiona from Henderson

Jennifer, a manager at Kmart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening.

After sorting through a stack of resumes she found four people who were equally qualified.
Jennifer decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, Jennifer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?"

The first man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There's no warning."

"That's very good!" replied Jennifer. "And now you sir," she asked the second man.

"Hmmm... let me see... A BLINK! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."

“Excellent!" said Jennifer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed." She then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.

"Well, out at my dad's farm, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."

Jennifer was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had found her man. “It's hard to beat the speed of light," she said.

Turning to Ernest, the fourth and final man, Jennifer posed the same question.

Old Ernest replied, "After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."

"WHAT?" said Jennifer, stunned by the response.

"Oh sure," said Ernest. "You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already popped my pants."

Ernest is the new greeter at the Kmart near you!

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More messages from your neighbours
J
16 hours ago

Rock'in with Elvis by Mike Cole

Jackie from Titirangi

The Memories of Elvis Fan Club invite you to our 1st Elvis Social for 2026. We are excited to have our own Mike Cole back at the Te Atatu RSA on Saturday 28th February at 7.30pm. Cost only $20pp. Tickets are on sale at the RSA or reserve through Jackie 0274901126. So lets see you with your dancing shoes on and that great smile as we start off 2026 with a bang.

21 days ago

Poll: As a customer, what do you think about automation?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

The Press investigates the growing reliance on your unpaid labour.

Automation (or the “unpaid shift”) is often described as efficient ... but it tends to benefit employers more than consumers.

We want to know: What do you think about automation?
Are you for, or against?

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As a customer, what do you think about automation?
  • 9.4% For. Self-service is less frustrating and convenient.
    9.4% Complete
  • 43.6% I want to be able to choose.
    43.6% Complete
  • 47.1% Against. I want to deal with people.
    47.1% Complete
2422 votes
M
22 hours ago

Room Available in Henderson

Mike from Henderson

Have a furnished room available with king single bed and heat pump. In newer home, $200/week utilities and internet included. Prefer young lady as bathroom shared with lady in mid twenties. We are a friendly group. Message me if interested.