Saturday's Funny: 😉🤢Do you fart in bed?🤢😉
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke, the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick.
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out.
Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room.
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.
She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was.
He said, “Honey you were right, all these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you.
“What do you mean?” asked his wife.
“Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in…..”
😄🤣😄🤣😄
Poll: Should the government levy industries that contribute to financial hardship?
As reported in the Post, there’s a $30 million funding gap in financial mentoring. This has led to services closing and mentors stepping in unpaid just to keep helping people in need 🪙💰🪙
One proposed solution? Small levies on industries that profit from financial hardship — like banks, casinos, and similar companies.
So we want to hear what you think:
Should the government ask these industries to contribute?
-
59.4% Yes, supporting people is important!
-
26.3% No, individuals should take responsibility
-
14.3% ... It is complicated
Poll: Should complete designs be shared with the public, or should the community help shape the designs from the start?
The Post recently shared an opinion piece on the Harbour Crossing and why a more democratic approach might be needed 🚗🚲👟
While most decisions sit within the political arena, many organisations—like NZTA—manage long-term projects that go beyond party lines. Politics can sometimes disrupt progress, and the next Harbour Crossing is a big decision that will affect all Aucklanders.
We’d love your thoughts: Should near-complete, shovel-ready designs be shared with the public, or should the community have a hand in shaping the designs from the start?
-
81.7% Community feedback and transparency is needed.
-
18.3% No. This would be impossible in practice.
Chinese New Year!
Happy Chinese New Year everyone!🎊
Join Red Cross Shop Henderson to celebrate the year of the Horse!🐴
Join us at:
433 Great North Rd, Henderson
(09) 8351152
Loading…
