Not everyone trapped by alcohol is an alcoholic
There is help for families affected by problem drinking.
In extreme cases, an alcoholic may be homeless, but many live in families that are struggling because of the challenges that come with problem drinking.
Family members become lonely, isolated, ashamed and depressed. They feel that life has become unmanageable or unbearable. Al-Anon-Alateen Family Groups is a support programme for people who are living with or have lived with the problems of someone else's drinking.
Al-Anon and Alateen for young people offer understanding and personal growth - whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not. There are free of charge meetings daily around Auckland. To find one visit online here.
Members share their experiences of applying the Al-Anon principles to their lives. There is no advice given or specific direction suggested.
Below are a few thoughts from people who have tried Al-Anon:
"I believed that the only thing I needed to be happy and safe was for my husband to stop drinking."
"My life had got so out of control not knowing what my state my daughter would be in when I got home."
"I thought I was strong enough to deal with this on my own...After trying everything, I went to my first meeting."
Live Q&A: Garden maintenance with Crewcut
This Wednesday, we're having another Neighbourly Q&A session. This time with John Bracewell from Crewcut.
John Bracewell, former Black Caps coach turned Franchisee Development Manager and currently the face of Crewcut’s #Movember campaign, knows a thing or two about keeping the grass looking sharp—whether it’s on a cricket pitch or in your backyard!
As a seasoned Crewcut franchisee, John is excited to answer your lawn and gardening questions. After years of perfecting the greens on the field, he's ready to share tips on how to knock your garden out of the park. Let's just say he’s as passionate about lush lawns as he is about a good game of cricket!
John is happy to answer questions about lawn mowing, tree/hedge trimming, tidying your garden, ride on mowing, you name it! He'll be online on Wednesday, 27th of November to answer them all.
Share your question below now ⬇️
Poll: Should all neighbours have to contribute to improvements?
An Auckland court has ruled a woman doesn’t have to contribute towards the cost of fixing a driveway she shares with 10 neighbours.
When thinking about fences, driveways or tree felling, for example, do you think all neighbours should have to pay if the improvements directly benefit them?
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82.5% Yes
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14.7% No
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2.8% Other - I'll share below
Breaking the Cycle of Taha Tinana (Physical Cravings) - Day 11
Breaking the Cycle of Taha Tinana (Physical Cravings)
In te ao Māori (the Māori worldview), humans are seen as beings of both taha tinana (the physical realm) and taha wairua (the spiritual realm). A balance between these aspects is essential for well-being. When we focus solely on satisfying our physical cravings—kai (food), moe (rest), hiahia (desires), and mataku (fear)—we risk losing our connection to wairuatanga (spirituality) and mauri (life force).
The Story of Tūmaro and the Sacred Rākau (Tree)
Once, a man named Tūmaro roamed the vast ngahere (forest) in search of a better life. He was tired, hungry, and filled with uncertainty about his future. As the sun blazed above him, he cried out to the atua (gods), seeking their guidance.
Hearing his plea, Tāne Mahuta, the atua of the forests, sent him a gift: a rākau manaaki (sacred tree) with the power to grant wishes. Exhausted, Tūmaro lay beneath the tree, and his first wish was for moe (rest). The tree immediately granted his desire, providing a cool shade, soft moss, and a gentle breeze that lulled him into a deep sleep.
When he awoke, his puku (stomach) growled with hunger. Without thinking, he wished for kai, and the tree responded with an abundance of delicious hākari (feast). He devoured it greedily, thanking no one for the gift.
Feeling satisfied, his mind wandered to hiahia (desire). Tūmaro wished for a companion to bring him pleasure and ease his loneliness. The tree granted this wish too, and soon he became absorbed in his desires, forgetting his original prayer to the atua.
As the day turned to night, Tūmaro became aware of the darkening ngahere and the distant calls of kēhua (spirits). Fear crept into his mind, and he thought, “What if a wild beast comes to attack me?” As soon as the thought arose, the sacred tree granted it—a kurī ngaro (ferocious beast) appeared and devoured him.
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The Lesson of Tūmaro
The kaumātua (elders) who shared this story taught that Tūmaro’s downfall was not caused by the rākau manaaki but by his own lack of balance. By giving in entirely to taha tinana (physical cravings) without nurturing his taha wairua (spiritual self), he created a cycle that led to his destruction.
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Values Reflected in the Story
1. Whanaungatanga (Connection): Tūmaro failed to acknowledge the atua and his connection to the world around him. Gratitude and mindfulness strengthen our relationships with others and with te taiao (the environment).
2. Wairuatanga (Spirituality): The story reminds us that taha wairua must be nurtured alongside taha tinana. Practices such as karakia (prayers) and aroha ki te Atua (love for the gods) maintain spiritual balance.
3. Manaakitanga (Respect and Care): Instead of respecting the sacred gift of the tree, Tūmaro became consumed by his personal desires, neglecting the importance of moderation and care.
4. Kaitiakitanga (Guardianship): The sacred tree symbolises the resources of Papatūānuku (Earth Mother), which must be used responsibly, with gratitude and care.
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Moral of the Story
The story of Tūmaro teaches us that balance is the key to a fulfilling life. Pursuing the needs of taha tinana without acknowledging taha wairua leads to imbalance and harm. To thrive, we must practice gratitude, moderation, and mindfulness. As values remind us, nurturing our spiritual connection ensures harmony within ourselves, our whānau, and the wider world.
In Tūmaro’s story, the sacred rākau served not only as a gift but also as a reminder of the power of our intentions and the need to honor both physical and spiritual well-being.
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