1042 days ago

Wednesday's funny: 😄🏪Kmart Interview🏪 😄

Fiona from Henderson

Jennifer, a manager at Kmart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening.

After sorting through a stack of resumes she found four people who were equally qualified.
Jennifer decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, Jennifer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?"

The first man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There's no warning."

"That's very good!" replied Jennifer. "And now you sir," she asked the second man.

"Hmmm... let me see... A BLINK! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."

“Excellent!" said Jennifer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed." She then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.

"Well, out at my dad's farm, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."

Jennifer was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had found her man. “It's hard to beat the speed of light," she said.

Turning to Ernest, the fourth and final man, Jennifer posed the same question.

Old Ernest replied, "After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."

"WHAT?" said Jennifer, stunned by the response.

"Oh sure," said Ernest. "You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already popped my pants."

Ernest is the new greeter at the Kmart near you!

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More messages from your neighbours
1 day ago

Q&A: Animal Welfare with SPCA's Dr Corey Regnerus-Kell

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

We're back with a Neighbourly Q&A session. This time with Dr Corey Regnerus-Kell who is a qualified veterinarian and SPCA’s General Manager Animal Services.

A little bit about Corey:
Corey has an interest in veterinary medicine, animal welfare, and biosecurity. He shares his home with ostriches, guinea pigs, bees, a rescue tortoiseshell named Lynk, a ragdoll named Oscar, two mini foxies called Chester and Maya and a black Labrador named Bonnie.

Dr Corey Regnerus-Kell is excited to answer your questions on all things animal welfare, whether it's how to best look after your new pet, how to combat separation anxiety or how to report neglect. ↓ Share your questions below and he will answer them on Wednesday 31st July ↓

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4 days ago

Poll: Should you ask before planting tall shrubs/trees near your property line?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

It may be fine now but in a few years trees can block out light or views for neighbours.

Do you think neighbours should ask before they go ahead and plant these?

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Should you ask before planting tall shrubs/trees near your property line?
  • 69.5% Yes, always ask
    69.5% Complete
  • 29.6% No
    29.6% Complete
  • 1% Other - I'll share below!
    1% Complete
1549 votes
19 days ago

Let's get social

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

Tell us what groups you'd like to see in your area...(walking groups, coffee meet-ups, swing dancing, a family tree group - anything at all!)

Or if you are already in a great group, share it here for others to get involved.

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