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When a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner of the place launched a daring proposal, "Whoever dares to jump, swim to shore and survive, I will give $1 million dollars."
Nobody dared to move, suddenly a man jumped into the water and desperately swam towards the shore … View moreWhen a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner of the place launched a daring proposal, "Whoever dares to jump, swim to shore and survive, I will give $1 million dollars."
Nobody dared to move, suddenly a man jumped into the water and desperately swam towards the shore while he was chased by all the crocodiles.
With great luck he arrived, taking the admiration of everyone in the place, then the owner announced; "We have a brave winner."
After collecting their reward, the couple returned to the hotel.
Upon arrival, the manager told him that he was very brave to jump, then the man said, "I didn't jump, someone pushed me!"
His wife smiled ...
Moral: "Behind every successful man, there is a woman who pushes him."
Dear neighbours,
As part of Stuff’s Life & Style Live Chat series, NZ Gardener editor Jo McCarroll and Jack Hobbs, manager of the Auckland Botanic Gardens, are back with their expert spring gardening tips, advice and plant problem-solving. If you have a question for the gardening experts, … View moreDear neighbours,
As part of Stuff’s Life & Style Live Chat series, NZ Gardener editor Jo McCarroll and Jack Hobbs, manager of the Auckland Botanic Gardens, are back with their expert spring gardening tips, advice and plant problem-solving. If you have a question for the gardening experts, you can submit it (now, or during the chat) at the link below. Then tune in today, Sept 17, at 3pm.
Give some plain store-bought pots a fresh new look using Resene FX Crackle effect. Use Resene FX Crackle effect to give a shabby chic look with on-trend paint colours.
Find out how to create your own.
In Zone and Out of Zone Applications for 2022 Enrolment, into Massey High School, are now OPEN!
In Zone Applications do not have a cut off date however, to avoid disappointment with option selections it is best to get your application in early.
Closure Dates for Out of Zone and Special Programmes … View moreIn Zone and Out of Zone Applications for 2022 Enrolment, into Massey High School, are now OPEN!
In Zone Applications do not have a cut off date however, to avoid disappointment with option selections it is best to get your application in early.
Closure Dates for Out of Zone and Special Programmes are as follows:
Summit Leadership - 24 September 2021.
Sports Performance & Development - 30 September 2021.
Out of Zone - 1 October 2021.
Te Whare Āhuru - 29 October 2021.
A Swiss guy visited Sydney, Australia, and pulled up at a bus stop where two locals were waiting.
"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he asked.
The two Aussies just stared at him.
"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tried.
… View moreA Swiss guy visited Sydney, Australia, and pulled up at a bus stop where two locals were waiting.
"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he asked.
The two Aussies just stared at him.
"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tried.
The two continued to stare.
"Parlare Italiano?"
Other than a glance at each other, there was still no response.
"Hablan ustedes Espanol?"
Still nothing.
The Swiss guy gave up and drove off, extremely disgusted.
When he was gone, the first Aussie turned to the second and said, "Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language."
"Why?" the other replied. "That guy knew four languages, and it didn't do him any good."
Mobile vaccination buses will be rolled out in Auckland from Thursday, in the style of Mr Whippy ice cream vans.
A similar initiative was launched in Australia at the start of the month, and buses became known as “Jabba the Bus”.
Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has challenged the public to… View moreMobile vaccination buses will be rolled out in Auckland from Thursday, in the style of Mr Whippy ice cream vans.
A similar initiative was launched in Australia at the start of the month, and buses became known as “Jabba the Bus”.
Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has challenged the public to come up with a better name, but has ruled out “Busey McBusface”.
What do you think the vaccination buses should be called?
Here are some ideas readers have emailed in to Stuff, but feel free to comment your own!
Have the 'delusions' set in by now?
Are you missing KFC?
Are you seeing KFC Chicken everywhere?
When Delta first showed up in NZ the Govt's words were. "Short, sharp lockdown"
I do not consider 5 weeks in level 4, and probably at least another 2 in useless level 3 as being a short sharp lockdown.
Nearly 2 months out of people's lives.
Roll on the day when those of us who … View moreWhen Delta first showed up in NZ the Govt's words were. "Short, sharp lockdown"
I do not consider 5 weeks in level 4, and probably at least another 2 in useless level 3 as being a short sharp lockdown.
Nearly 2 months out of people's lives.
Roll on the day when those of us who are fully vaccinated can have some freedom!
Those who choose not to be vaccinated can stay home.
Kia ora Neighbours, Two big lockdowns and the GFC before them will leave more scars on Auckland's most vulnerable communities. Is it time for more than a crisis response? Read the article below:
It's te wiki o te reo Māori, and to celebrate this awesome initiative, we've given our logo a little update.
'Haporitanga' means 'the many principles and actions of being a community' and we think it's a great way to express what Neighbourly is.
Are you … View moreIt's te wiki o te reo Māori, and to celebrate this awesome initiative, we've given our logo a little update.
'Haporitanga' means 'the many principles and actions of being a community' and we think it's a great way to express what Neighbourly is.
Are you keen to dive straight into te wiki? Here's a video by our mates at Stuff showing five te reo words that every person from across the motu (country) needs to know.
For more coverage on Māori language week, click the 'See more' button below.
Ngā manaakitanga!
Salmon in Filo Pastry with Lemon Beurre Blanc prepared by our Advanced student, Timmika from home.
This is a versatile recipe that can be made with different types of fish and wraps the fish in a parcel of filo pastry.
Recipe out now.
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.
One of the bags was ripped, and every once in a while, a $20 note fell out onto the footpath.
Noticing this, a Policeman stopped her, and said “Excuse me Ma’am, there are $20 notes falling out of … View moreA little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.
One of the bags was ripped, and every once in a while, a $20 note fell out onto the footpath.
Noticing this, a Policeman stopped her, and said “Excuse me Ma’am, there are $20 notes falling out of that bag”
“Damn” says the little old lady, “I’d better go back and see if I can find them and pick them up”
“Not so fast” says the cop, “How did you get all that money? Did you steal it?”
“Oh, no” replied the little old lady, “You see, my back yard backs up to the local sports stadium and each time there is a game, a lot of fans come by come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden.
It used to really tick me off, kills the flowers you know. Then I thought, ‘why not make the best of it?’
So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, ‘OK buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.’
“Well, that seems only fair,” said the cop, laughing. “OK, Good luck! Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?”
"Well, you know", said the little old lady, "not everybody pays."
A man was stopped by a fishery officer recently with two chilly bins full of live fish in water, leaving a river well known for its fishing.
The fishery officer asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
"Nah, my friend, I ain't got no license. These here are … View moreA man was stopped by a fishery officer recently with two chilly bins full of live fish in water, leaving a river well known for its fishing.
The fishery officer asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
"Nah, my friend, I ain't got no license. These here are my pet fish."
"Pet fish?"
"Yep. Every night I take these fish down to the river and let 'em swim round for a while. Then I whistle and they jump right back into this chilly in and I take 'em home."
"That's a bunch of rubbish! Fish can't do that!"
The man looked at the fishery officer for a moment and then said, "It's the truth. I'll show you. It really works."
"Okay, I've GOT to see this!"
The man poured the fish into the river and stood and waited. After several minutes, the fishery officer turned to him and said, "Well?"
"Well, what?" said the man.
"When are you going to call them back?"
"Call who back?"
"The FISH!"
"What fish?"
To do our part, here's two phrases we believe everyone should know in Te Reo Māori.
Hi neighbours,
What’s your local Covid-19 testing centre, and has it been busy or empty lately?
Please vote and comment!
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