Saturday's Funny: 😉🤢Do you fart in bed?🤢😉
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke, the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick.
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out.
Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room.
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.
She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was.
He said, “Honey you were right, all these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you.
“What do you mean?” asked his wife.
“Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in…..”
😄🤣😄🤣😄
Rock'in with Elvis by Mike Cole
The Memories of Elvis Fan Club invite you to our 1st Elvis Social for 2026. We are excited to have our own Mike Cole back at the Te Atatu RSA on Saturday 28th February at 7.30pm. Cost only $20pp. Tickets are on sale at the RSA or reserve through Jackie 0274901126. So lets see you with your dancing shoes on and that great smile as we start off 2026 with a bang.
Poll: As a customer, what do you think about automation?
The Press investigates the growing reliance on your unpaid labour.
Automation (or the “unpaid shift”) is often described as efficient ... but it tends to benefit employers more than consumers.
We want to know: What do you think about automation?
Are you for, or against?
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9.4% For. Self-service is less frustrating and convenient.
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43.5% I want to be able to choose.
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47.1% Against. I want to deal with people.
Room Available in Henderson
Have a furnished room available with king single bed and heat pump. In newer home, $200/week utilities and internet included. Prefer young lady as bathroom shared with lady in mid twenties. We are a friendly group. Message me if interested.
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