COVID-19 – an important health message to our community
A positive case of COVID-19, has seen a short term return to Alert Level 3.
In Alert Level 3 of our COVID-19 response, unless there are exceptional circumstances, compassionate grounds, or birthing partners, family are not able to visit loved ones in hospital.
Compassionate or exceptional ground could include a family member to support:
● A patient through end of life care;
● Someone who has been in hospital for a long time
● A child in hospital
● Women giving birth in a maternity facility
Whaanau who want to visit a patient need to request this in advance. The decision will be made by a lead clinician.
You can stay connected with your loved ones by calling, emailing or texting them.
For information and contact details for all our sites visit:
www.countiesmanukau.health.nz
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
What am I?
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”