Walter
Yo, Walter came through, took a chainsaw to my trees,
First the fruit, then the magnolias—what’s the deal, please?
Dumped broken bottles, shattered glass on my lawn,
Turned my peaceful little garden to a battle at dawn.
I’m out here minding business, keeping it legit,
But Walter's got the nerve to throw a childish fit.
Assaulted me, reported me—what’s his next play?
All ‘cause I used some weed spray on a sunny day.
*(Chorus)*
Walter, why you hatin’? What did I do?
Cut down my trees and broke my peace too.
You’re toxic like the weeds I’m tryna clean, dude,
Messin’ with my vibe—why you gotta be rude?
*(Verse 2)*
Yo, the fruit trees were memories, planted with care,
But you cut ‘em down like you didn’t even care.
My magnolias were blooming, sweet and serene,
Now they’re gone like a nightmare in a bad dream.
You think you’re tough, but your moves are foul,
Breaking bottles on my lawn, acting hostile now.
You tried to bring me down, but I rise like the sun,
Walter, you’ve started something you can’t outrun.
*(Chorus)*
Walter, why you hatin’? What did I do?
Cut down my trees and broke my peace too.
You’re toxic like the weeds I’m tryna clean, dude,
Messin’ with my vibe—why you gotta be rude?
*(Bridge)*
Now I’m stronger, got my roots in the ground,
You can’t shake me, Walter, I’ll always rebound.
You can cut my trees, but you can’t stop my bloom,
I’ll turn this mess around, bring life to the gloom.
*(Outro)*
Walter, take your drama, pack it up, and leave,
I’m building something stronger, you better believe.
My garden will grow, my spirit will thrive,
You can’t keep me down, I’m staying alive.
Scam Alert: Bank cold calls
ASB is warning customers about reports of cold calls from scammers claiming to be from ASB. These scammers are trying to obtain personal information, including usernames, dates of birth, and verification codes sent to your mobile phone.
🛡️ The "Caller Check" Test
If you get a call from someone claiming to be from ASB and you’re unsure, just ask them for a Caller Check. You will then be able to verify the call through the app.
Remember, banks will:
❌ Never ask for your banking passwords, PINs, or verification codes
❌ Never need to know your full credit card number – especially the CVC
❌ Never ask you to download software or remotely access your device
❌ Never ask you to purchase gift cards or transfer funds.
If you have received a phone call and think your account has been compromised, call ASB on 0800 ASB FRAUD (0800 272 372), or visit your local branch.
🧩😏 Riddle me this, Neighbours…
I am an odd number. Take away a letter and I become even. What number am I?
Do you think you know the answer?
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Poll: Are you still heading to your local for your caffeine fix, or has the $$ changed your habits? ☕
Wellington’s identity is built on its cafe culture, but with costs climbing, that culture is under pressure. We’ve seen the headlines about recent closures, and it’s a tough pill to swallow along with a $6+ coffee.
We all want our favourite spots to stay open, but we also have to balance our own budgets ⚖️
We want to know: How are you handling the "coffee math" in 2026? Are you still heading to your local for a chat and a caffeine fix, or has the cost of living changed your habits?
Keen to read more about "coffee math"? The Post has you covered.
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42.8% I avoid spending money on coffee
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46.8% I still indulge at my local cafe
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10.4% Irrelevant - coffee is not for me
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