803 days ago

Police Remembrance Day – 29th September

Glen from Gonville

A police motorcycle officer stops a driver for shooting through a red light.

The driver, really aggro, steps out of his car and comes striding toward the officer, demanding to know why he is being harassed by the Gestapo!
So the officer calmly tells him of the red light violation.

The motorist instantly goes on a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit offensive terms.
The tirade goes on without the officer saying a dickybird.

When the officer finishes writing out the ticket he puts an "AH" in the lower right corner of the narrative portion of the ticket and then hands it to the 'violator' for his signature.
The bloke signs the ticket angrily, and when presented with his copy points to the "AH" and demands to know what it stands for.
The officer says, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember that you're an a*hole."

Two months later they're in court.
The 'violator' has a bad driving record and he has a heap of points and is in danger of losing his licence, so he hired a barrister to represent him.
On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run through the red light.

Under cross examination the barrister for the defence asks; "Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client?"
The police officer replies: "Yes, sir, that is the defendant's copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top."

Barrister: "Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don't normally make?"
"Yes, sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an "AH," underlined."

"What does the "AH" stand for, officer?"
"Aggressive and hostile, Sir."

"Aggressive and hostile?"
"Yes, Sir.”

"Officer, are you sure it doesn't stand for a*hole?"
“Well, sir, you know your client better than I do.”

(Now how often can one get a lawyer to convict his own client?)

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More messages from your neighbours
15 days ago

Some Choice News!

Kia pai from Sharing the Good Stuff

Many New Zealand gardens aren’t seeing as many monarch butterflies fluttering around their swan plants and flower beds these days — the hungry Asian paper wasp has been taking its toll.

Thanks to people like Alan Baldick, who’s made it his mission to protect the monarch, his neighbours still get to enjoy these beautiful butterflies in their own backyards.

Thinking about planting something to invite more butterflies, bees, and birds into your garden?

Thanks for your mahi, Alan! We hope this brings a smile!

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1 day ago

Poll: Are our Kiwi summer holidays helping us recharge, or holding the economy back? ☀️🥝

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

There’s growing debate about whether New Zealand’s extended Christmas break (and the slowdown that comes with it) affects productivity.

Tracy Watkins has weighed in ... now it’s your turn. What’s your take? 🤔

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Are our Kiwi summer holidays helping us recharge, or holding the economy back? ☀️🥝
  • 71.6% We work hard, we deserve a break!
    71.6% Complete
  • 18% Hmm, maybe?
    18% Complete
  • 10.4% Yes!
    10.4% Complete
328 votes
7 days ago

A riddle to start the festive season 🌲🎁🌟

The Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

I'm a fruit. If you take away my first letter, I'm a crime. If you take away my first two letters, I'm an animal. If you take away my first and last letter, I'm a form of music. What am I?

Do you think you know the answer? Simply 'Like' this post if you know the answer and the big reveal will be posted in the comments at 2pm on the day!

Want to stop seeing these in your newsfeed?
Head here and hover on the Following button on the top right of the page (and it will show Unfollow) and then click it. If it is giving you the option to Follow, then you've successfully unfollowed the Riddles page.

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