2706 days ago

Ageing comes early to some.

Bruce from Napier South

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #191

I'm writing this vanity card at six o'clock in the morning on October 18, 2007. It's my birthday. I am fifty-five years old. I have long ago become invisible to young women. They actually do not see me. But I am not writing this to complain. I am at peace with my circumstances. The blessing of fifty-five is a libido in decline. The curse of it is that major pharmaceutical companies are successfully exploiting my insecurities. Suddenly that surreal commercial of a silver-haired guy sitting naked in an outdoor bath tub and holding hands with a naked, slightly younger woman in an adjacent tub makes perfect sense (if I had produced that spot I would've have given him a small plasma screen TV so he could watch ESPN during his hang time). I'm also mesmerized by the commercial featuring middle-aged men gleefully celebrating their ability to drink water and drive long distances (I particularly enjoy that the slightly younger women in that one are turned on knowing that their geezers don't have to urinate frequently). Anyway, it's my birthday today. If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go suck on my bronchitis inhaler so that later today I can blow out the candles without hacking up a lung.

More messages from your neighbours
2 days ago

Poll: If we want to reduce speeding, what do you think actually changes driver behaviour? ๐Ÿ›ป๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿš“

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

In the Post's article on speeding penalties, the question is asked whether speeding fines are truly about road safety, or are they just a way to boost revenue for the Crown?

What do you think? Should speeding motorists receive speeding fines or demerit points?

Image
If we want to reduce speeding, what do you think actually changes driver behaviour? ๐Ÿ›ป๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿš“
  • 37.1% The sting of a fine (Money talks!)
    37.1% Complete
  • 62.9% The threat of demerit points (Nobody wants to lose their license!)
    62.9% Complete
483 votes
3 hours ago

๐ŸŽ‰ Riddle me this, legends! ๐ŸŽ‰

The Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

He/She who makes it, sells it.
He/She who buys it, doesn't use it.
The user doesn't know they are using it.
What is it?

(Shezz from Ngฤruawฤhia kindly provided this head-scratcher ... thanks, Shezz!)

Do you think you know the answer? Simply 'Like' this post if you know the answer and the big reveal will be posted in the comments at 2pm on the day!

Want to stop seeing these in your newsfeed?
Head here and hover on the Following button on the top right of the page (and it will show Unfollow) and then click it. If it is giving you the option to Follow, then you've successfully unfollowed the Riddles page.

Image
5 days ago

Scam Alert: Bank cold calls

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

ASB is warning customers about reports of cold calls from scammers claiming to be from ASB. These scammers are trying to obtain personal information, including usernames, dates of birth, and verification codes sent to your mobile phone.

๐Ÿ›ก๏ธ The "Caller Check" Test
If you get a call from someone claiming to be from ASB and youโ€™re unsure, just ask them for a Caller Check. You will then be able to verify the call through the app.

Remember, banks will:โ€‹โ€‹
โŒ Never ask for your banking passwords, PINs, or verification codesโ€‹โ€‹
โŒ Never need to know your full credit card number โ€“ especially the CVC
โŒ Never ask you to download software or remotely access your deviceโ€‹โ€‹
โŒ Never ask you to purchase gift cards or transfer funds.

If you have received a phone call and think your account has been compromised, call ASB on 0800 ASB FRAUD (0800 272 372), or visit your local branch.

Image