2586 days ago

Intimate Conversations

Ann from Relationship Wellbeing Specialist

Not really. Not entirely. Fear was taken from the reality of Merriam-Webster. Intimacy was taken from the reality of human relationships. Ultimately, when we are afraid of the possible consequences, we cannot trust our partners to listen and fully support us – especially not when it comes to our deepest feelings, hopes, or dreams. And why should we?

Our internal wiring prevents us from opening our hearts to those we fear will hurt us emotionally, from worries that they will let us down, to terror and anxiety about their potential to leave us. This is, in the language of evolutionary psychology, called an adaptive trait. It’s healthy. We need to protect ourselves!

Dr. Gottman understands this. His book on trust tells us to listen to these feelings, but also provides incredibly important methods for discerning how trust functions (or malfunctions) in our relationships. He doesn’t waste any time in getting to the core of the issue: trust begins in emotional attunement. Emotional attunement is often rooted in the ways in which we speak to each other – trust is built and broken in our everyday conversation.

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More messages from your neighbours
4 days ago

🧩😏 Riddle me this, Neighbours…

The Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

I am an odd number. Take away a letter and I become even. What number am I?

Do you think you know the answer?

Want to stop seeing these in your newsfeed? No worries! Simply head here and click once on the Following button.

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1 day ago

Scam Alert: Bank cold calls

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

ASB is warning customers about reports of cold calls from scammers claiming to be from ASB. These scammers are trying to obtain personal information, including usernames, dates of birth, and verification codes sent to your mobile phone.

🛡️ The "Caller Check" Test
If you get a call from someone claiming to be from ASB and you’re unsure, just ask them for a Caller Check. You will then be able to verify the call through the app.

Remember, banks will:​​
❌ Never ask for your banking passwords, PINs, or verification codes​​
❌ Never need to know your full credit card number – especially the CVC
❌ Never ask you to download software or remotely access your device​​
❌ Never ask you to purchase gift cards or transfer funds.

If you have received a phone call and think your account has been compromised, call ASB on 0800 ASB FRAUD (0800 272 372), or visit your local branch.

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10 hours ago

Offers, Events & Inspiration

Wendy Wu Tours

Ready to explore the world with ease?
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Departing from New Zealand, you’ll travel with like-minded adventurers and enjoy seamless, stress-free travel. If you’ve been dreaming about your next big trip, now’s the perfect time to make it happen.
Find out more

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