5 Conversation Starters for Couples
Conversation starters for couples: Does that sound kind of fake?
Like if you need conversation starters then you've got a problem?
John Gottman, a relationship/ marriage researcher, has done some amazing work on what makes a successful relationship and what makes a relationship fail. In his research he was able to predict, after only seeing a couple for 15 minutes, which couples will divorce within 10 years because he learn't that the tiny things mattered.
One of major findings was that successful relationships, had 5 positive conversations and interactions to every 1 straining one a 5-1 ratio. But struggling relationships that split the radio was 1:1.
So we have to be intentional about having those positive interactions! But that can be tough, especially with kids, busy work schedules, if you're exhausted and most conversations you have are to do with groceries, kids activities and work schedules.
Here are 5 conversation starters:
1.What's a favorite memory from when we were dating?
2.What did you want to be when you were 10 years old?
3.What dreams have you put on the back burner?
4.If you were on a desert island, but your needs for food and shelter were totally taken care of, what one luxury item would you wish for?
5.What is your earliest memory?
5 ways to use them in your relationship
1.Put the ideas on your phone, go for a walk together every night and talk about the questions.
2.If you have kids, Take 15 minutes after dinner and tell the kids to play, because it's adult time. Talk about the questions.
3. Head to bed 15 minutes earlier than usual.
4. Have Saturday or Sunday breakfast with a purpose.
5. Use conversation topics each night dinner. Eat without any TV and talk instead.
Remember: the more you get to know each other and talk about real things, the easier it will be to deal with the ups and downs that come with any long term relationship.
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Ann Jay Relationship Wellbeing Specialist
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