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Seeing as we are still stuck at home and I have a captive audience I thought I might as well hit you with this :
A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.
In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy.
… View moreSeeing as we are still stuck at home and I have a captive audience I thought I might as well hit you with this :
A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.
In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy.
'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor?
Paddy responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... '
'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'
Paddy said, 'Well, I'd just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin' down da road.... '
The solicitor interrupted again and said, ‘Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. '
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie'.
Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded.’ Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin' her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin' and groanin'. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after da accident, a policeman turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin' and groanin' too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feelin'?'
'Now wot would you say?'
We love seeing our apprentices making waves in the industry.
Wade Peek was recently named Plastics Apprentice of the Year, is definitely one to watch. With two qualifications under his belt, he’s been earmarked as a future plastics industry leader.
He hopes to one day start his own … View moreWe love seeing our apprentices making waves in the industry.
Wade Peek was recently named Plastics Apprentice of the Year, is definitely one to watch. With two qualifications under his belt, he’s been earmarked as a future plastics industry leader.
He hopes to one day start his own manufacturing business and says: "I really want to pass on what I have learnt to support apprentices in their training. I also want to be able to teach people outside of the plastics industry about what we do, as I truly believe we can't solve any of the really important environmental issues that surround plastic unless as many people as possible understand it."
If you are thinking of signing up for an apprenticeship, get in touch with us here
Here is a weekend puzzle for those of you who enjoyed the last one. Answer to follow on Monday.
Teaching values and life skills to young Kiwis across Aotearoa is important so we want to make sure everyone has accessibility to Tamariki Talks no matter what level you are in. Tamariki Talks brings Kiwi Can to you!
Check out our Tamariki Talks Challenges offering a range of fun activities to … View moreTeaching values and life skills to young Kiwis across Aotearoa is important so we want to make sure everyone has accessibility to Tamariki Talks no matter what level you are in. Tamariki Talks brings Kiwi Can to you!
Check out our Tamariki Talks Challenges offering a range of fun activities to keep tamariki entertained, let us know how they go!
Dear neighbours,
Every month, NZ Gardener runs a series of tested reader recipes using a seasonal crop. We are now on the hunt for rocket recipes, so send your best ones to mailbox@nzgardener.co.nz before Aug 31, 2021.
Every published recipe wins a copy of our special edition Homegrown Recipes.
Form meets function in this stylish bin storage and planter combination painted in bold Resene hues. Find out how to create your own.
Lockdowns are tough for many in business, so let us share the load.
Whether it's setting up technology to keep your business running smoothly, or advice on working remotely.
Get in touch with us, we’d love to help.
Seeing as everyone is home today because of the weather ..I thought you might need cheering up
Marriage is like a deck of cards
In the beginning all you need is is two hearts and a diamond.
In the end you wish you had a club and a spade.
Sorry and do remember you aren't allowed to visit me… View moreSeeing as everyone is home today because of the weather ..I thought you might need cheering up
Marriage is like a deck of cards
In the beginning all you need is is two hearts and a diamond.
In the end you wish you had a club and a spade.
Sorry and do remember you aren't allowed to visit me today.. :-)
Kia ora Southland neighbours!
We hope that you are safe and sound with your bubbles at home.
With two weeks to go until nominations close – it's time to lockdown your nomination for 2022 Kiwibank New Zealander of the Year. We're looking for that special person in this community – … View moreKia ora Southland neighbours!
We hope that you are safe and sound with your bubbles at home.
With two weeks to go until nominations close – it's time to lockdown your nomination for 2022 Kiwibank New Zealander of the Year. We're looking for that special person in this community – the one doing exceptional mahi to make Southland a better place.
Nominations close 31 August and only take 5 minutes.
Get in quick – www.nzawards.co.nz...
Is this you?
You know building the skills and capability of your staff is vital, but it’s hard to know where to start or even where to turn for advice, so it keeps sliding down your to-do list.
Use this guidebook to develop your company’s capability and improve your bottom line.
UPDATE
August 18
1.16pm
The Prime Minister and the Director-General of Health are currently giving an update to the nation at the Beehive.
Here's what you need to know:
- Genome sequencing was undertaken last night and it has been confirmed that this is linked to the NSW outbreak.
- … View moreUPDATE
August 18
1.16pm
The Prime Minister and the Director-General of Health are currently giving an update to the nation at the Beehive.
Here's what you need to know:
- Genome sequencing was undertaken last night and it has been confirmed that this is linked to the NSW outbreak.
- There are no genomic matches to those cases at the border to this case.
- There are a further two cases to report in the community.
- From 11:59pm, it will be compulsory to wear masks when accessing essential services.
- From 8am tomorrow, the Covid-19 vaccination programme will resume.
___________________________________________________________
UPDATE
August 18
9.10am
- Four new cases have been identified, all genomically linked to the original case
- The original case has been confirmed as having the Delta variant
___________________________________________________________
New Zealand will move to a Level 4 lockdown after a community case was detected in Auckland.
Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern was joined by Ashley Bloomfield at a press conference, where she confirmed that Auckland and Coromandel would move to Alert Level 4 from 11.59pm for seven days, while the rest of the country will be under Level 4 conditions for three days.
It is unknown whether this case is that of the Delta variant. Bloomfield stated that genome sequencing will be completed by tomorrow morning.
There is currently 23 locations of interest, 10 in Auckland and 13 in Coromandel. Current locations of interest can be found here.
The case has no links to the border and interviews are currently being undertaken with the case to find any possible locations of interest and how they came to be in contact with Covid-19.
Here's what you need to know:
- A refresh on Level restrictions and what it means for you.
- Here are the locations of interest.
- If you have any flu-like symptoms, call the NZ Covid-19 Healthline on 0800 358 5453 or ring your GP.
- Find your closest Covid-19 testing location on the Healthpoint website
- Essential services such as supermarkets and pharmacies will remain open.
For more information, visit covid19.govt.nz.
Father's Day is just around the corner, and we have some great gift ideas for your Outdoors dad in our store.
Ask our staff if you need any help for selecting the perfect gift your Dad.
And Check out our competition.
Be into win a Led Lenser Head torch valued at $199
Spend over $50 for an … View moreFather's Day is just around the corner, and we have some great gift ideas for your Outdoors dad in our store.
Ask our staff if you need any help for selecting the perfect gift your Dad.
And Check out our competition.
Be into win a Led Lenser Head torch valued at $199
Spend over $50 for an entry in the draw.
Want to increase your reach by thousands? Now's your chance!
For a limited time only, we're offering you a 3 month Premium Business listing for only $79+GST*
Usually $149+GST, Neighbourly Premium enables you to grow a strong presence in your local community. Find friendly … View moreWant to increase your reach by thousands? Now's your chance!
For a limited time only, we're offering you a 3 month Premium Business listing for only $79+GST*
Usually $149+GST, Neighbourly Premium enables you to grow a strong presence in your local community. Find friendly neighbours who need your services, showcase what makes you stand out from the rest and connect with people who want to ‘shop local’.
*T&Cs apply
We're very excited to announce Digital Boost as our new Neighbourly partner.
Digital Boost is a free online learning platform providing tutorials on how to operate a business in today's digital world.
We truly believe in the support and tools they provide to help digitally upskill … View moreWe're very excited to announce Digital Boost as our new Neighbourly partner.
Digital Boost is a free online learning platform providing tutorials on how to operate a business in today's digital world.
We truly believe in the support and tools they provide to help digitally upskill New Zealand SME businesses.
Please join us in welcoming Digital Boost and stay tuned for tips and tricks, online tutorials and other exciting content!
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