🌧😄We all need a giggle on a rainy day😄🌧
WARNING TO LADIES OF A CERTAIN AGE!!
You've no doubt heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black market organ thieves.
My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago.
I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs.
It was just that quick.
The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal.
Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs.
Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans.
And then the thieves struck again.
My bottom was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier.
But my new bottom was attached at least three inches lower than my original!
I realised I'd have to give up my jeans in favour of long skirts.
Two years ago I realised my arms had been switched.
One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush.
This was really getting scary; my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?
When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story.
Women of the world wake up and smell the coffee!
Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts - stolen from you and me!
The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again, was it lifted from you?
THIS IS NOT A HOAX.
This is happening to women everywhere every night.
WARN YOUR FRIENDS!
P. S. Last year I thought someone had stolen my boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
I thought this was too important not to pass on.
Have a wonderful day with a joy filled heart.
Always remember to laugh!! It helps the heart AND the wrinkles!!
P.P.S. Those same thieves just came into my closet and shrank my clothes!
How do they do that?
What's your favourite recipe for courgettes?
Kia ora neighbours. If you've got a family recipe for courgettes, we'd love to see it and maybe publish it in our magazine. Send your recipe to mailbox@nzgardener.co.nz, and if we use it in the mag, you will receive a free copy of our January 2025 issue.
Live Q&A: Garden maintenance with Crewcut
This Wednesday, we are having another Neighbourly Q&A session. This time with John Bracewell from Crewcut.
John Bracewell, former Black Caps coach turned Franchisee Development Manager and currently the face of Crewcut’s #Movember campaign, knows a thing or two about keeping the grass looking sharp—whether it’s on a cricket pitch or in your backyard!
As a seasoned Crewcut franchisee, John is excited to answer your lawn and gardening questions. After years of perfecting the greens on the field, he's ready to share tips on how to knock your garden out of the park. Let's just say he’s as passionate about lush lawns as he is about a good game of cricket!
John is happy to answer questions about lawn mowing, tree/hedge trimming, tidying your garden, ride on mowing, you name it! He'll be online on Wednesday, 27th of November to answer them all.
Share your question below now ⬇️
Calling All Puzzle Masters! Can You Solve This?
When John was six years old he hammered a nail into his favorite tree to mark his height.
Ten years later at age sixteen, John returned to see how much higher the nail was.
If the tree grew by five centimetres each year, how much higher would the nail be?
Do you think you know the answer to our daily riddle? Don't spoil it for your neighbours! Simply 'Like' this post and we'll post the answer in the comments below at 2pm.
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Head here and hover on the Following button on the top right of the page (and it will show Unfollow) and then click it. If it is giving you the option to Follow, then you've successfully unfollowed the Riddles page.
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