1619 days ago

Thursday's Funny: 😄👩🏻Eve's side of the story👩🏻😄

Fiona from Henderson

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve.
"So, how is everything going?" inquired God.

"It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breath taking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem…
It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain."

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. She felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more 'symmetrically balanced'.

"That's a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away."

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes

Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden.

"Well, Eve, how is my favourite creation?"

"Just fantastic," she replied, "But for one oversight. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone."

God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you. Let's see.... where did I put that useless boob?"

Now doesn't THAT make more sense than the rib story?

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More messages from your neighbours
4 days ago

🧩😏 Riddle me this, Neighbours…

The Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

I am an odd number. Take away a letter and I become even. What number am I?

Do you think you know the answer?

Want to stop seeing these in your newsfeed? No worries! Simply head here and click once on the Following button.

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1 day ago

Scam Alert: Bank cold calls

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

ASB is warning customers about reports of cold calls from scammers claiming to be from ASB. These scammers are trying to obtain personal information, including usernames, dates of birth, and verification codes sent to your mobile phone.

🛡️ The "Caller Check" Test
If you get a call from someone claiming to be from ASB and you’re unsure, just ask them for a Caller Check. You will then be able to verify the call through the app.

Remember, banks will:​​
❌ Never ask for your banking passwords, PINs, or verification codes​​
❌ Never need to know your full credit card number – especially the CVC
❌ Never ask you to download software or remotely access your device​​
❌ Never ask you to purchase gift cards or transfer funds.

If you have received a phone call and think your account has been compromised, call ASB on 0800 ASB FRAUD (0800 272 372), or visit your local branch.

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5 days ago

Some Choice News!

Kia pai from Sharing the Good Stuff

DOC is rolling out a new tool to help figure out what to tackle first when it comes to protecting our threatened species and the things putting them at risk.

Why does this matter? As Nikki Macdonald from The Post points out, we’re a country with around 4,400 threatened species. With limited time and funding, conservation has always meant making tough calls about what gets attention first.

For the first time, DOC has put real numbers around what it would take to do everything needed to properly safeguard our unique natural environment. The new BioInvest tool shows the scale of the challenge: 310,177 actions across 28,007 sites.

Now that we can see the full picture, it brings the big question into focus: how much do we, as Kiwis, truly value protecting nature — and what are we prepared to invest to make it happen?

We hope this brings a smile!

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