2108 days ago

*An Obituary printed in the London*

Nikhil from Oteha

*Times.....Absolutely Dead Brilliant!!* 👌👌

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- And maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death,
-by his parents, Truth and Trust,
-by his wife, Discretion,
-by his daughter, Responsibility,
-and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;
- I Know My Rights
- I Want It Now
- Someone Else Is To Blame
- I'm A Victim
- Pay me for Doing Nothing

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

————-
*Very well written piece. Should circulate to all those who still have the common sense to understand what this piece is all about.*
🙏🏼🙏🏼

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The Summer Kiwi Quiz is back by popular demand

Summer Kiwi Quiz - 2026

Grab a copy of your local Stuff newspaper between 1 Jan - 28 Jan and participate in the Summer Kiwi Quiz! Test your knowledge, answer the daily New Zealand based questions, and find out how well you know our beautiful country!

Each correct answer will get you one entry into the draw to WIN 1 of 5 Ooni Karu 2 Portable Pizza Oven bundles, valued at $1024! Each bundle includes: an Ooni Karu 2 Multi-Fuel Portable Pizza Oven, Ooni Karu 2 Carry Cover, Ooni 12" Perforated Peel, Ooni Digital Infrared Thermometer and an Ooni Cookbook: Cooking with Ooni. The more answers you enter correctly, the higher your chance of winning. For more information and to submit your answers, click here

The Team at Stuff
Enter Here

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The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

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We’re curious ... how do you welcome it?
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Do you set New Year’s resolutions?
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    10.4% Complete
  • 19.7% Yes - but I rarely stick to them
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The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

The Ministry of Social Development is reporting that fake information is circulating about new ‘December bonuses’ or ‘benefit increases’

If you get suspicious communication, please contact Netsafe.

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